I am

I am
what I am
and what I am
at times I wish were not I am

I loose my temper
and tell the other
how dare you speak to me this way
yet for a stranger

it does not matter who is right or wrong
but the one who is mad
red and hot
is the one who is senseless

I am becomes senseless
and that is not what I am should be
so I am become quite
and people ask me

am I angry
while I am silent
to make me even more angry
and I feel like resorting

Can't you see I am quite
then why are you asking me if I am angry!
oh how much patience it takes to control
my anger

I feel like bursting into tears
just leave me alone
all of you
let me be alone

and let me be at peace

Is it me?
Is it I who can't handle anger
or am I justified to say
that the people around me
make accusations at me
snide remarkds
sacarsism

am I not rightfully right
to become angry?
and then I dislike these people
yet they are related to me

so unfortunately
I can't give a cold shoulder
I have to live with them
under the same roof
and bear their 'Are you angry'
while I am quite and indifferent to them

I am right now
troubled
and harrassed
emotionally

one by who chooses to ignore me
second by who accuses me for her carelessness
third by my indifference to what people expect from me

and so I choose
to be quite
and I choose not to talk
and not to meet
so that i do not confront
people whom I have hurt
or who have hurt me

and who think
I am
a looser, a liability and a hot head filled with hot air
who can't see any sense
and takes things too sensitively

well
I am can become
you don't have to bother what I am
I am is independent and can be any day
you don't need to talk to my head
or listen to what I air
no opportunity for you to reason with me
and no contact with your character to make me sensitive

as much as I would like that
I am afraid it cant be
I guess I have to bear their attitudes
like I said
Unfortunately,
they are related to me.