Caught in my own trap

I am at crossroads
I am trapped in my own game
I said x to some
now I have to say y to others

yet when they all come together
they shall come to know
both x and y version
of my life

I have dug up this grave
now I have to lie in it
I thought I would get away with it
but now I have to face it

So many people
So many different things
What is it that I believe
should I come out in the open and spill

I am just frustrated with this situation
trying to make one party happy
while the other suffers
yet I am not sure who is more important to me

This society and man made laws
Its people and their various notions
All so crazy and all so dawdy
To hell with them all

I will do what I feel right!

the problem is....

I don't know what is right